A friend of mine is involved in a not so right relationship- the relationship is not exactly wrong but what she s doing in it is not right. So while we talked, she told me how she had managed to silence her conscience until it finally shut up. So every time she does something that would not be to the honour of God, she just clams up her mind and concentrates on other things.

For a moment I wished I could be like her. I have a conscience that eats me and gnaws at my consciousness till I have to face whatever it is I have done, and sort of ‘wipe the slate clean.’ It is also not an ok habit. Because it deludes me to believe, even though for a moment, that I can wipe my slate clean before God. I can’t. Though He tells me that for His OWN sake He forgives and forgets, I know it is not that he has forgotten I ever did that. It is just that he does not hold that against me. In His dealings with me, it is as though I never sinned, though I do.

How liberating. Then, I don’t have to shut off my conscience and snuff off the fire of the spirit. Knowing that there is nothing about me that God doesn’t know- not my weaknesses, not my failings, not my gifts, not my future, insecurities etc. He sees and knows it all. And graciously He has provided a way to deal with my sin, once and for all- at the Cross.